loveedition | starsand // starnet DM / open post

[ ...she went to speak, but she catches herself. She was going to say of course she wasn't. The other magi could've done anything without her help. Her mind starts to drift to why she wanted to keep going in her last battle in the first place. To do something useful at the cost of her own life. She was lucky enough for that to not come to the worst outcome.

...instead, she thought of something else. Before that battle. ]

We had a lot of skilled fighters, but that's not all there is to it. If it was just strength, we would've been wiped out completely.

...the person we shoved in charge told me once. For everything bad that had happened to him, for as much as I had messed up before, he'd still need me to be there with him, as long as I can.

I suppose...

...yeah. I was a little important.

[Yuuto listens. He knows that it's hard to share your past, especially parts like this: Where Ryoko is hinting at her past failings, but trying to make peace with them at the same time. He nods slowly in understanding. For once, he doesn't fight her on the use of 'little' in that sentence. It's enough for him that she's beginning to sincerely recognize her worth without prompting.]

Was that hard is hear?

[He finally speaks up in a more tentative voice, ready to back off if she's done talking about it... But also, ready to show this other side of him for the sake of their conversation.]

Sometimes it's hard to hear that you're important... Because it means you can't give everything away, you know? So... [If she found that hard to hear from someone, then he would understand.]

...not at all. Really. It made me happy.

It made me feel like... I actually belonged there for once.

[ah.

That's not how he would have reacted. And hearing the difference between them, Yuuto realizes again that there is something deeply wrong with him. He's not going to address it right now. He's more worried about Ryoko and knows he'll make himself sick if he worries about two people at once. But he does file that away.]

I see... I'm glad. It sounds like you have experience working in good teams then..?

[He tries to smile again.]

You would probably know a lot about how we should organize ourselves. I usually work alone.

...to be honest, all things considered, I wouldn't know if we could be called a good team. I'm glad I was trusted that much, and I think he was reliable, but a lot of the other magi... Aisaka-san called them dysfunctional, and that was being mild about it.

[ Part of the reason why Taiga so often got mad at her. ]

I think I could, though. Provided everyone is okay listening to my suggestions...

I mean, suddenly getting powers probably doesn't make you very stable, does it?

[He mutters thoughtfully, but otherwise buries that thought.]

If you had something to say, then I think others would listen to you... People like you here. I would listen..? If you had a plan using my power, I'd do whatever you asked..?

I know that I can't speak for everyone else, but...

You know how you're uncertain about everything you're saying right now, right?

[ Before he can get flustered about it-- ]

That's why I could never do it. I've never had the confidence to lead anyone. That's the best trait a leader could have, really.

[Yuuto frowns slightly. She does have a point, but-]

Confidence isn't born from nowhere, is it? That kind of feeling isn't 'confidence.' It's 'arrogance.'

If you need to take some time to think about it, then I get it. I won't push. But I'm not uncertain about what I said: If you had a use for me, I'd follow your lead.

[He's able to be a bit more forceful this time. It's something that he's been thinking about a lot recently: The use of his life and the value he's been selfishly building.]

[ ...he was actually serious about this. She remembers being asked about leading before, and she absolutely didn't want that responsibility.

Now... ]

...

Give me some time. I... I need to figure myself out before I commit to anything again. From there... I'll do what I can.

[Yuuto returns her resolve with his own determined expression.]

Mm. Please don't make that decision right away. You're going through a lot already... and I guess I've kinda gotten us off track, huh?

[He leans back, trying to sigh away his tension.]

I apologize. I got carried away... No one else lets me talk this way.

[ She sighs... ]

It's fine. We both got carried away. The point's the same, isn't it?

As long as you help me... I'll be there to help you too. Got it?

Mm. It's a...

[His voice trails off. Yuuto considers a great many things in the next few seconds, while a variety of emotions cross his face. He's sad to say this. Hurting, a bit more scared than he wants to let on, and sort of angry with himself for this.

But when he looks back at Ryoko, he's resolved to smile and have faith again. No matter how many times he gets knocked down for believing in people. Even if this comes back to haunt him and his heart gets broken all over again. Yuuto doesn't want to give up on seeing the world and the people in it as good and beautiful, so-]

It's a promise, Ryoko. I trust you.

Thank you for everything.

Of course.

[ As long as she's needed. She gives him a bright smile, attempting to soothe him. Honestly, she didn't know how much of the future she wanted to know, or what could happen in the near future.

All she wanted was to be helpful. To help someone else with their story.

Now, for her sake, she was going to craft her own. ]

I won't let you down. I promise.

You either! I promise to always be your ally!

Oh. I know!

[Yuuto holds out his pinky finger, smiling.]

This is how humans make their promises official, right?

[ Oh, her heart's melting. Granted, she's not made of ice or anything, but... ]

Sure is. [ And, she pinky swears, linking hers with his. ]

starsand // starnet DM / open post

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